Jason Wallace

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“Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

– Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)


xxxxxVain. Greedy. Clever. And those are his good traits. Wallace is the apparently rare intersection of hard work and expensive taste. His clothes, even the casual ones, are tastefully selected, coordinated, and even tailored. Brooks Ghost sneakers. Prada Chelsea boots. Gucci suit in the perfect shade of navy blue. The Audi TTS is dependable. With 292 horsepower and 280 lb-ft of torque, the setup is good for a 0 to 60 mph run of 4.6 seconds and it looks like sex on wheels.

xxxxxYou can find him at the gym, but only early in the morning. You can find him at the pub, but only if they have a decent selection of imports or a broad selection of music from the 1980s. You can find him in his office, first to arrive and last to leave. Where you won't find him is at home; interesting people are too busy for that. All the strange things in the world happen when you're out and about, exploring the night to see what will go bump.

RP Hooks
  • Astronomy - If you knew the Algenib in Pegasus is not the Algenib in Perseus, we should find a time to go up on a mountain and look at the stars.
  • Computers - You run OpenVMS on a virtual machine? I've got a Vax 11/780 and teletype on the same network as my smartphone and Surfacebook.
  • Fast cars - If you show me yours, I'll show you mine.
  • Male Fashion - Murses are out, vests are in.
  • Money - Who doesn't like money? Greed. Is. Good.
  • Music and movies of the 1980s
More Stuff
  • Favorite Book - Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail '72
  • Favorite Band - Queen
  • Favorite Movie - The Last Starfighter
  • Favorite TV Show - Twin Peaks
  • Favorite Drink - Red Bull Orange Edition, or Franziskaner Hefeweisen
Social Media
  • Brianna - Workout buddy with great posture and a killer back.
  • Burton - Who knew replacing the an automatic double-clutch could be so expensive?
  • Chase - Same game, same coin, different sides. I'm still with you, brother.
  • Chiara - I've never met someone who knew so much about the pearls of astronomy.
  • Eva - Let's keep it professional; I respect your skills but I don't like to be burned.
  • Red - Honestly, I didn't know that Dark Secrets was a chocoletieria. I plead the fifth.

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Date of Birth: April 1st
Apparent Age: 30ish
Occupation: System Admin at Irving Oil
Virtue: Fortitude
Vice: Greed


Ram Jam - Black Betty

ZZ Top - Sharp Dressed Man

Joan Jett - I Hate Myself for Loving You

Queen - Another One Bites the Dust

"How do you think I'm going to get along
Without you, when you're gone?
You took me for everything that I had
And kicked me out on my own
Are you happy, are you satisfied?
How long can you stand the heat?
Out of the doorway the bullets rip
To the sound of the beat"
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